Loves' Secret Past
by QueenKingrid
Summary: An au story! what would Gossip Girl be like if Chuck was Lily and Rufus long lost son. I know that it is not possible but what if?
1. Chapter 1

GOSSSIP GIRL Fic

This fic is au. It is a total what if scenario and I know that it like totally will never happen but I have been feeling so bad for Chuck with the whole not having any family at all. I started wondering what it would be like for Chuck if he discovered that he suddenly did have a family. One that he in fact never would have expected and I came up with this idea so… In this story everything on Gossip Girl has happened. Rufus discovers that Lily had a baby and gave him up when he was born. That baby is and will be for the purposes of this story the one and only Chuck Bass. In order for this to be possible however in this fic Chuck Bass has been adopted by his parents Bart and Misty Bass a fact in which he was totally unaware of. In this story Chuck started school late because of circumstances (medical and adoptive). So in this story he is in fact 19 years of age (a fact that he is well aware of but actually never really put much thought into the reasons why) and thus the story begins. This story will include spurts of flashbacks that will come close to and also be exact wording from show episodes. This story takes place in the past and starts in the gossip girl episode Oh, Brother, where Bart thou.

I own absolutely nothing! If I did why in the hell would I be wasting my time writing fanfic?

Reviews and comments are encouraged and will defiantly be appreciated.

Title: Love's Secret Past

A Story about a forbidden love and the secrets its past conceal

Lily and Rufus

Chuck and Blair

Serena, Dan, possibly

Eric and Jenny friendship

Chapter 1

1989 May 19

Lily closed her eyes as her body suddenly shuddered with a physically powerful contraction. The doctors coached her through a final push in which she screamed the whole while through. She breathed a sigh of relief and exhaustion as the baby was suddenly taken from her body and lifted into the air.

"It's a boy" the doctor said softly as he cut the umbilical cord. He then handed the child to the nurse and Lily opened her eyes in time to see her baby being wrapped in swindling blankets.

"I want to…I want to hold him" she said her voice a whisper. "Of course" the nurse replied as she walked towards the bed and placed the silent child into Lily's arms. Lily couldn't believe it. He was so beautiful with his wispy, murky hair and dark eyes. "Oh….. He's perfect…. My flawless angel "she whispered into the child's hair.

"What do you think you're doing?" a voiced said as it roared through the room angered. "Why is she holding the child? She's giving it up for adoption! She is not supposed to see the baby! I told the staff that!" the voice scolded.

"Mother…Please" Lily begged as the hospital staff hurriedly removed her baby from her arms. "We did not know" the doctor apologized

"No one informed us."The nurse added as she gathered the baby and hastily exited the room.

"No…My baby!" Lily screamed as she watched a piece of her heart…another love be taken away from her.

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2008

Lily walked into the den of her home and was startled to see Chuck sitting on the leather sofa sipping on Scotch.

"I just can't believe that you'd want this to become public knowledge" Chuck stated

"What is that? Lily asked she knew what it had to be. She could tell by the evil smirk crossing the kids face and her heart sank into her chest and began hammering harder than it ever did before.

"Oh, it's exactly what you think it is." Chuck responded his voice condescending and very sharp

"But my mother..." Lily began. Her mom had said she'd taken care of the problem when she'd spoken to her after the funeral.

"Lied to you" Chuck responded "and to Mr. Tyler. Judging by the look on your face I'm guessing it wasn't your idea to come clean"

"Why on earth would she do this?" Lily asked herself her voice a tone of confused wonder

"I don't know, but the next time I see her I would ask" Chuck responded "but until then I am more than happy to further her agenda." Lily shook her head this kid was so messed up she thought. She did not want this personal information about her life become public knowledge. It was a secret that she had been keeping so long, and so close to her heart that Lily did not think that she would be able to cope with people knowing the horrible thing she'd done so many years before.

"Charles, I _beg you …please don't turn away from the people that love you! They are the only chance that any of us have and your father never learned that. I hope that you do" she said before walking away. The kid was blaming her for his last living parents death and she felt so guilty about the part that she may actually have played in it , that she did not think that she could even really be angry with him for what he was threaten to do with her secret. If he told her secret she realized that was his choice. She prayed that he wouldn't but he was the type of person you never knew with._

She had to go and find the man that she loved .She had let circumstances get in the way of the loved she shared with Rufus Humphrey almost 20 years ago. She would never (if she could) let anything stop her from being with him ever again. She would just have to deal with Charles later. She told herself as she headed to her room to pack a small bag and get ready to live the life that she should have been living with her love and their children.

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Lily stood in the airport and waited for Rufus. She was so thrilled! She had finally gained the courage to do something now that she could not do all those years ago. She was running away to be with the man that she loved. She pulled out her compact and checked her appearance again for the 10th time since she'd been waiting. Then she hastily placed the mirror back in her bag. She looked fine. She took a deep breath and a smile graced her face as she finally spotted him walking towards her.

She was so delighted. This was the moment that she had been waiting for her entire life. But, the look on his face did divulge the equivalent feelings of love and joy; in fact Lily realized as he walked closer he wasn't happy at all. He looked as if he were incensed .When he was mere feet from her she realized he wasn't carrying any luggage and that his hands were balled into angry fist as if he wanted to punch something or someone. He looked distrustful. Before Lily could say anything he attacked her with a look of what had to be pure abhorrence and it stopped her lips from moving and her brain couldn't structure words. He placed his hands on his hips and she knew it. He knew! Somehow he knew and she just could not believe it.

"Just tell me one thing" he demanded" is it a boy or a girl!" Lily shook her head .This was unbelievable and she could not deal with this. She precariously ran her fingers threw her hair and took in a shallow breath

"What… I don't… What are you asking me?" she responded.

He shook his head in pure disgust. He was disgusted by her! Lily felt her legs go weak. She deserved this look; the one he was giving her .And the thought that he was the second person to give her the look of hate this week was one that made her want to disappear (Charles had looked at her the exact same way right before he had enlightened her on how much the sight of her disgusted him). She was a horrible person.

"I can… let me explain" she begged

He laughed at her and his laugh was one of unbelief

"That's…that's all you have to say! I can't believe it your mother told me that you had a baby for me almost 19 years ago! What the Hell were you thinking! You did not even tell me you were pregnant."

"Rufus" Lily whispered she could not believe that this was happening

"I can't go anywhere with you!" he spit out at her as if the words were a venom that would and could actually kill her."You are not the person I thought you were and maybe you never ever were" he said quietly before turning and walking away with his shoulder flaccid.

Lily felt her eyes filling with tears and as a solitary tear rolled, she rapidly grasps her possessions and wretchedly left the airport. She had done it again. She had lost the one man she could ever really love.

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Chuck frowned as the words Lily said to him looped around his head. He was at a lost now for what he was suppose to do. He closed his eyes and released a breath. He hated Lily! He really did. She was the reason he was now alone in the world (her and her lover Rufus Humphreys.)But most of all he hated her because she reminded him that when it really came down to it was his fault that his father was dead. If he had not called Bart and informed him of what he had seen then his father would be alive and he would be free to go on leading his happy, glamorous, meaningless, rich life with no problems.

He gulped the last of his drink uncrossed his legs and stood up from the sofa. Lily was right. He had no one now except for her and her family and she had said that she loved him in a roundabout way. He smirked as he realized that he was so pathetic. "I hate you Lily" he whispered to himself. But, he did not want to get involved with another scandal. He had enough on his plate. He picked up the document that would expose Lily to the world as the lying whore that he knew she was, he lit it ablaze and then placed it into the fire place. His was tired and he just did not have the strength to be involved in something so heinous.

He found himself sitting on Blair's bed about 2 hours later. And he was not exactly sure of how he got there. He let his head hang low as he concentrated on the silk comforter on her bed. His shoulders stiffened when he heard her door open and then second later he heard her shoes angrily hitting the floor.

"What are you doing here?" she asked and her voice almost sounded angry, almost. That's a good question he said to himself but, aloud he said nothing. He was unaware of what he was doing here. He honestly did not know how to respond to the question. He closed his eyes briefly then opened them again and looked up at her.

She startled at the look on his face and frowned before almost running over to him and wrapping him in her small arms. He let himself be overflowed with her smell. He leaned on her and pulled her closer to him with one arm. He felt safe in her arms. It was a surprise to him when moments later he felt tears coming from his eyes. He never cried! As they lay back on the bed together with her arms encircling him he allowed himself to relax. He could hear her whispering soothing words in his ear and he wanted to die when he felt her soft hands running threw his hair with intent of comforting him. He felt his eyes becoming closed and moments later they drifted closed and he had fallen into a restless much needed slumber.

Blair found herself laying awake watching Chuck sleep. He was in so much pain and as much as she wanted to help him, she realized that there was really nothing she could do. So, she held him close in her arms and watched him breathe for as long as she could. Inevitably she fell asleep and when she awoke again a couple hours later to check on him, he was gone. She ran her hand in his vacated spot that was still warm from his body heat and she found the letter he had left that requested that she not come looking for him.


	2. Chapter 2

Loves Secret past Chapter 2

1 month later

Rufus jumped when his cell rang, then he hurriedly opened it and answered as quickly as he could. "Mr. Humphrey?" a voice asked and Rufus let a hesitant breath escape his body right before he closed his eyes and waited for the answer that he knew would come.

"I'm sorry but we could find nothing on the adoption you inquired about. My advice to you would be to contact the mother and ask what she knows. She may be able to help you" The voice advised before hanging up and Rufus found himself back at square one.

He had been searching for his child from the moment that Cecilia had told him about it. He was a loss of where to begin. He had no information to start with, he didn't even know the sex of his child and the child could be anywhere now. The call that he'd just received was from the 3rd agency he had contacted and the response had been the same as the other 2. Everyone was suggesting that he contact the mother and that was the exact problem. He did not believe that he could even stand to look at Lily.

But, the more he sat and thought about the situation, the more he realized that Lily was really his only option. If he wanted to know where to begin to look for his baby he needed to talk to Lily and find out as much information as he could. Rufus gathered his keys and excited his small loft apartment intent on finding Lily and forcing her to tell him everything that she knew about the adoption.

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Lily pulled out her phone and for the 10th or maybe the 15th time this month she began going through the list of numbers that had been locked in her phone of all the people who at some point usually came into contact with Charles. "Blair…" Lily began when the phone was answered with a simple "Hello", "I am so sorry to be calling again but I was wondering… have you seen or heard from Charles?" Blair was silent on the phone and after a beat she sighed and her voice soft as she responded "no".

Lily hung up the phone after common pleasantries had been exchanged and she was just about to place a call to Nathanial when her phone began ringing. "Hello" Lily responded without even checking the caller I.D maybe it was someone with some type of information on her stepson.

"Lily" the voice retorted, Lily paused it was Rufus. To say that she was surprised would have been an understatement." Rufus… How may I help you" Lily asked her voice soft but surprisingly calm. This was the first time that she had s spoken to Rufus since the confrontation when he had informed her that her mother had told him about the baby she had given up all of those years ago.

"Actually" Rufus said walking into the café in which she was seated and seating himself across from her. He closed his phone and leaned in close to her before beginning to speak to her in a whisper. "I was hoping that you could give me some more information on the adoption of my kid"

"Rufus... Do not start" Lily began. "I am not in the mood for this… I have enough on my plate as it is. In case you haven't noticed my husband is deceased and my stepchild is gone astray". Rufus frowned and then begin laughing softly. "That's comical … you know you playing concerned parent to a stepchild when your own child is somewhere in the world, God only knows where and you don't seem to give a shit about that one"

Lily's faced creased in hurt and anger. She cared about her baby. If he'd known how much she cared about that baby he would most likely be surprised. "I don't have to defend my actions to you or anyone else. You have no idea how I feel" Lily said as she stood from the table, hurriedly gathered her belongings and begin her descent from the café. "I know you gave away my baby and you didn't tell me. I know that you are not trying to help me find the child and I know that you have yet to tell me anything. I don't even know if the child is a boy or a girl!"

"I am sure the child is perfectly fine. When I gave him up I was assured that he would have a good life and get the best of everything" She said. She could not give Rufus much, but at least she could give him the knowledge that the baby was fine and living a good life.

"So, It's a boy…at least that's something" Rufus said to himself. Lily nodded her head and began her exit again.

Rufus pulled her back and bit his lip. He was trying to figure out how to go about getting as much help from Lily as he could." Lily when I gave up my dreams of being a rock star and became a parent, I took that job very seriously. I love being a parent. It brings me joy, that's who I am, that's what I do. Please" he pleaded"Please don't take that from me. Help me Lily! If you ever loved me please, I need this. Please help me find my son"

Lily's eyes filled with tears and she sniffed her nose to hold them back. She didn't want to cry. She wanted to be happy and she wanted Rufus to be happy. In fact that was all she ever wanted for everyone but, somehow she kept managing to screw things up with the people that she loved.

"Okay" she conceded "I will help you. Let me make a few calls and I will get back to you as soon as I know something" She said before exciting the café and disappearing into New York City.


	3. Chapter 3

LSP Chapter 3

Lily frowned after hanging up the phone with the adoption agency. They had agreed to have their representing lawyer meet with her (after the promise of a million dollar contribution to the agency), to discuss the adoption that she had been involved in all those years ago. She shook her head reconsidering her decision to pursue knowledge about the adoption of her first born son. This was a bad idea she thought. She frowned and bit softly on her thumb nail maybe she should have thought twice before agreeing to help Rufus with search to find their child.

She sat her phone down on the table and contemplated the choice of whether or not to follow through with the arranged meeting this afternoon with the adoption agency. She was beginning to have some major doubts about whether or not she should treck back into her past, a past that she so desperately wanted to forget.

"Hey mom" Serena voice rang happily as she suddenly entered the room and interrupted the private thoughts that Lily was having with herself.

"Oh a…. Hello sweetie how are you doing today?" Lily asked today he voice distant as if she did not really even care.

"Mom… Are you okay?" Was Serena's' reply. Lily forced a smile onto her face and ran her hands nervously through her hair. "Yeah...Why are you asking?" she questioned softly. Serena shook her head smiled and took in her mother's frazzled appearance." I don't know you just seem nervous or I don't know weird" Serena responded.

"I'm fine I just have to do something. I'll be back" Lily said before getting up and hastily exciting the room leaving behind a very puzzled Serena. If she was going to do this she wanted to quickly get it started so that she could end it as quickly as possible. Lily pulled out her cell phone dialed Rufus and quickly told him where to meet her.

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The adoption agency 3 hours later.

Lily and Rufus turned as the man swiftly entered the room. They had been quietly sitting side by side anxiously awaiting any news on the adoption of their son.

"I am so sorry for being late" the man said as he seated himself across from them and heavily sat down in his chair." I contacted your mother's lawyer about the adoption and it was… hard to get him to spill any information, also, a bit…time consuming but with the proper persuasion you know how things can go…."

Lily frowned" How did things go?" she asked a bit skeptical. The lawyer smiled and leaned closer to Lily and Rufus. He was now almost on the desk. "We'll, it would seem that the adoption was high priced and very confidential. No one even knows that the child was adopted. It was so confidential that family members outside of the immediate family don't even know that the child was adopted"

"High Priced?" Rufus asked and the lawyer smiled "Yeah, the people who adopted him where rich off their ass!"

"You said were" Lily responded a Frown appearing on her usually calm, pretty face" What does that mean?" She asked

"It means….that the parents are no longer around to contest your meeting up with your son. It means, that….I was able to get the information you were looking for" The lawyer said while sliding an envelope across the table." What can I say money talks" the lawyer responded

Lily reached for the envelope and opened it slowly "It says here that both parents are deceased, the mother died years ago. The father…. "No, this can't be right!" Lily said shaking her head. "No" she whispered as she handed the file to Rufus

"What does it say?' he asked as he took the file from Lily who was looking as if she had just seen a ghost.

"It says that the child is named Charles…. Bass?" Rufus stopped and turned to look at Lily" that the adoptive father was Bartholomew Bass"

"You didn't know?" he asked and Lily shook her head. She did not know. She could not believe it. All this time she had been around her son and she hadn't even known. Her son, her baby had been right under her nose all this time. That's when the thought crossed her mind. He hated her. He had told her as much. Charles was her son and he absolutely despised her.

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Rufus sat in the cafe watching Lily. She had been absolute silent since the revelation of who her son was had been dawned upon her. She looked pale and shaken and Rufus was surprised but he had actually been relieved by the news.

He had found his child whom he had desperately wanted to find. He finally after agonizing knew who his child was and now all he had t o do was contact him and start building the relationship with him that he had with his other children. This was great news.

"I don't even know where he is" Lily whispered softly.

Rufus frowned" What do you mean you don't know where he is?" Rufus asked as he once again took in Lily's' appearance. She was really not looking so great. He thought that she would be happy to have found her child but she wasn't and her sour mood was bringing him down fast.

"I mean I haven't seen him in I don't know how long. And the only thing that I am sure of is that he is no longer in New York. He has an almost endless supply of money and he could be anywhere" she whispered then looked at Rufus for his response. Rufus was silent. He did not know what to say to that. He had forgotten that Lily had said that she had been looking for her stepson (now their son), and had absolute no idea where he was.

" Well we could put a trace on his credit card and if he has been using it, we could use that to track down where he is" Rufus said trying to reassure her though he was still upset with her and had no idea why he was even trying to make her feel better. She had been the cause of all of this as far as he was concerned.

"He hates me" she said shaking her head as tears begin to spill from her eyes. "He absolutely hates me. You should have seen the way that he looked at me the day I tried to talk to him in Bart's office. He said that the sight of me disgust him"

"We'll once he finds out who you are maybe" Lily shook her head before interrupting him." You don't know this child" she said "he is not the forgiving type and he's hurt. He will most likely hate me even more then he did before." She looked up at Rufus after she'd wiped her eyes with a handkerchief that she taken from her designer bag "What do I do now?" She asked "What do I do?" she repeated and Rufus who by now was at a total loss for words said nothing. There was nothing that he could think to say because to be honest, he had no idea where to start.


	4. Chapter 4

LSP 4

Lily walked into Bart's home office and began rummaging through his desk. She wondered if he'd had any idea that Charles was her biological son. She let the thought that he knew about almost everything she and her other children had done in the past run through her mind (he had files on her, Serena, and Eric). She was finding it hard to believe that he did not know about this. She just could not see Bartholomew Bass not investigating a child the family of a child he was considering adopting. It just wasn't like him. And, she wondered if his knowledge that she was in fact Charles biological mother had anything to do with the way that the vigorously pursued her.

She seated herself at his desk, opened his drawers and slowly commenced going through them. Nothing she realized after delving through meaningless documents for a couple of minutes. She was beginning to feel overwhelmed again as she begins to think about clues that may have suggested that Bart knew all along that Charles was her Child.

She thought about the fact that he had been so adamant about her legally adopting Charles and making him her own. They had even begun the process by having legal documents drawn up! "He knew!" she whispered to herself before beginning her search again. She pulled out a small photo album that had been hidden all the way in the back of the desk drawers.

She smiled to herself when she opened it and found a progression of Charles as he aged. He was beautiful and she could see pieces of both herself and Rufus in him now that she'd never seen before she actually known to look. Tears began to form in her eyes. She'd missed it. She had missed the chance to see her eldest son grow up and now it was too late. He was gone and she had no idea how to find him.

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Cecilia answered her cell phone on the second ring as soon as she recognized her daughter's number. She was not surprised; she had put wheels into motion when she told Rufus about the son that he'd never known that he'd had. She had known that after that it would only be a matter of time before Lily had been dragged back into her past and made to deal with what she had been trying to forget for so long.

Before Cecilia could say hello she was assaulted with her daughter angry voice "Mother how could you!" Lily all but screamed into the phone." Well hello to you too?" CeCe responded a bit sarcastically. It certainly is nice to hear from you" she added after an uncomfortable beat.

"Now is not the time for games mother. How could you do this to me? You knew didn't you?" Lily accused in a rush of words. Cecilia sighed" If you are talking about the fact that your long loss son is Charles Bass….then, yes. I did" she said. She then left time for a pregnant pause so that Lily could process the information that she had just given her.

"So, its true mother you knew Charles was my child and you said nothing…. You let me marry Bart and said nothing. Why would you do this?"

"I wanted you to get the chance to be close to your son" Cecilia said when Lily's had finally finished ranting. "And believe it or not, I did it because I wanted to make sure that your son was going to be well taken care of. I never made you get involved with Bartholomew. You did that on your own and once you'd decided to marry him I thought that it was in fact for the best. I mean, he's new money but he's better than your usual type the boy's biological father for example".

Lily rolled her eyes. She was shaking she was so upset and her mother was the type of person who didn't believe in listening to other people's opinions on situations. Lily couldn't really handle this. She at this point did not even know why she'd tried. Her mother was unreasonable.

"Well mother. I hope that you're happy! I got the chance to be around my son and now he hates me" she said softly before hanging up the phone.

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Lily arrived at Rufus's loft at 9 o clock that night. She sent a silent prayer to the Lord in hopes that his children were still out of town visiting their mother. She did not think that she had the strength to face them on top of everything else. When he opened his door and reluctantly stepped back in order to allow her to enter. She breathed in a sigh of relief that the house was quiet and that he was there alone. She shoved the photo album into his hands and seated herself on the sofa.

"What's this?" he asked cautiously. She stared at him and waited for him to open it. He ran his hands softly across the expensive leather and slowly opened it. His eyes rose from the album a few second later and he searched her face and waited for her to say something.

"I thought you might want to see pictures of your oldest son" she said softly as he slivered through the pictures without even looking up at her. His full attention on remembering his sons features.

"Wow" Rufus said softly as he moved his way toward the back of the album. "He really is a flamboyant kid isn't he?"

"Yes, it seems he takes great pride on showing how different he is by the way that he dresses" Lily added a smile on her lips.

"I don't know anything about him" Rufus said "he's almost a man and I don't know anything about him. I don't know what he likes or dislikes" he added he seemed almost near tears.

Rufus walked toward Lily and handed her the album" Thanks for the sneak peak but it doesn't really change anything. I never got the chance to see my child grow up and those pictures don't really tell me anything because they are few and far between." Lily nodded her head. She understood what he was saying because she felt exactly the same way. She had actually lived with Charles, been around him and she still didn't know much about him. In fact Serena and Eric most likely knew him better than she did.

"I know" she replied after a beat." But we still have time. We'll find him, explain the situation to everyone and began the process of getting to know him" She added to ease the tension that was now in the room. And her words did the trick. They both allowed themselves to lay in the unrealistic bliss that her words gave but, inside they could both knew that it was not going to be that easy because Charles Bass was never easy and that was the one thing she had come discover about her son in the short time she been blessed to be around him.


	5. Chapter 5

LSP 5

Blair frowned at the unavailable number that was ringing on her phone. The last time that her phone had rung an unavailable number the person who was on the other line never said a word, just inhaled and exhaled really hard. Blair had the sinking suspicion that it may have been Chuck Bass but there was no way to prove it and since she couldn't prove it, and as she picked up her phone and placed it against her ear she felt her heart skip a beat and she sighed in relief when this time the familiar voice whispered her name.

"Chuck" Blair said softly. He'd made contact and Blair was relived. It had been so long since anyone had heard a word from him. She was excited that he had chosen her to make contact with. The phone was silent and she could hear him breathing.

"Where are you?" she asked. She was trying her best to keep her voice low, soft and inviting the way that someone would talk to a freighted kitten so that she did not scare him. "Blair" his voice whispered again. He voice sounded very strange, confused even. It was making her scared.

"Tell me where you are and I will come and get you" Blair said" I don't know" the voice responded wearily causing Blair to bit her lip in aggravation. "Tell me what's near you!" Blair demanded right before the phone went dead. She checked her phone again waiting for him to call back but he didn't and she was right where she had started back at square one, with no idea where to begin.

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Lily sat across from the private investigator and tried to make herself concentrate on what he was saying, but his words were making absolutely no since . The only thing she'd caught was the fact that they had still found no trace of Charles. She watched in confusion as the boring man went on and on about the next steps they could pursue and she wondered top herself why he had yet to pursue them before making this useless report to her

Lily raised her hand and shook her head instantly silencing the man. "What do you mean you still have e no idea where he is?" she asked her voice soft and angry. This was ridicules they were making it seem as if it was so difficult to find Charles. "How can someone just disappear?" she asked.

"Mrs. Bass, I assure you that we are doing our best to find Charles Bass. We've searched many places and we still have many more that we can search" Lily stood abruptly and sat down her glass that she'd been sipping on.

"Fine, Report back in a few days. Hopefully with better news" She pressed and the man nodded and excited the room. Lily watched the door close than ran her hands nervously through her hair. She was losing patience and time. She needed to calm herself down.

Yes, things were moving forward. Now, all she had to do was calm her down and get ready for Charles' arrival home. She could handle this she told herself as picked up her class of wine and took a calming sip. She had everything under control.

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Chuck hung up the phone as quickly as he could. She was willing to drop everything she was doing to come and get him. What was he thinking? He wondered. Why did he always turn to her? It was like he could not control himself. Whenever he got scared, lost, confused, sad, upset, he called her. It was unavoidable. It was just the way they were.

He'd run the scene of that day over and over in his head. It was driving him crazy and lately all he could see was her trying to make him let her come with him. That was all she'd wanted and he could still hear her words ringing in his ear. He'd made it very clear that she was not his girlfriend. He was trying to make her so upset that she'd walk away from him and never look back. But, she'd been so insistent

"But, I am me, and you are you." She'd said instead of walking away the way that he had wanted her to. "We're Chuck and Blair, Blair and Chuck." She'd continued and he forced himself to listen. "The worst thing you've ever done. The darkest thought you've ever had, I will stand by you through anything!" she had declared. The words had confused him and freighted him even. No one had ever said anything like that to him before. And, he'd stood there for a couple of seconds before asking her why she'd do that. When she'd declared that it was because she'd love him, he couldn't take it anymore. He felt trapped. He'd fled.

He needed Blair and she needed him and that was unacceptable because Chuck Bass needed no one. He poured himself another drink, and then downed it as fast as he could. Talking to her had made him yearn for her even more. He was fucking himself up just thinking about her. He needed to forget everything associated with her and if that meant that he could never return to New York's Manhattans' Upper East Side again, then that was the way that it had to be to protect her.

He was doing it for her. Because everything he ever touched got destroyed. He was damaged and always had been. His mother had died, He loved his father so much sometimes that it shocked him and he died. He was beginning to feel that he could love Blair more then he loved his dad and if she died…., he couldn't even think about it. He couldn't even bare the idea of her dead. It was enough to cause him physical pain. He loved her too much. She'd end up hurt and he couldn't let that happen. "No" he whispered to himself shaking his head. He'd never go home again. Not if he could help it. So, he poured himself another drink and tried to forget everything.

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Blair found herself at Lily's office she contemplating whether or not to enter when the door suddenly opened and a very composed fabalousley dressed Lily can sway out. She looked weird a little too composed but whatever "Blair" Lily said as she almost bumped into her" Why this is a surprise! What are you doing here?" She asked as she plastered a big fake smile onto her face.

"I need to talk to you Lily" "and it can't wait!" she added when she saw Lily began to walk away as if she was about to brush off her request. Lily stopped in her tracks and turned back around to face Blair, her smile gone.

" What is it?" she asked "It's Chuck he called me this morning….and I think he is in really serious trouble" she said softly as tears came to her eyes and then began to slowly fall.


	6. Chapter 6

Lily walked back into the office and allowed Blair to follow her. Once inside she seated herself and waited for Blair to do the same. " Let's try this again" she said" Calm down and tell me exactly what's going on" Blair shook her head softly and gently reached her hand up to wipe away her lonely tear that she'd unknowingly allowed to fall.

"He, Chuck" she begin "He's called me before….since he's been gone, At least I think it's been him but I'm not sure. But um yeah….He called me this morning and it was something in his voice" she said and then paused. Lily was silent as she patiently waited for Blair to regain composure and explain the situation.

"He sounded …I don't Know" she continued "He sounded really weird, lost. And, I asked him to tell me where he was so that I could come and bring him home but he refused" She stopped and looked at Lily and the tears were beginning to fill her eyes again.

"I know that you most likely don't care about him one way or another". She added "but, I love him and I didn't know who else to come to for help. Chuck needs us and we have to find him." Blair finished before digging into her large bag for a handkerchief which she pulled out and used to clear the traces of tears from her face.

Lily sat across from Blair and for the first time in a long time really took the chance to look at her. She was a beautiful girl and she loved her son. "Charles is lucky to have someone like you who really cares about him" Lily said softly before standing abruptly. This was too much. She could feel her hold on emotional control slipping and she didn't want Blair to see her break.

" I want you to know that I am well aware of the fact that Charles is missing and I have private investigators working o n that as we speak" she said her voice cold and calm. "I will let you know the minute I know something" Lily added before picking up her bag and quickly exciting the room leaving behind a very angry and confused Blair Waldorf.

Lily could feel her throat closing up. She felt as if she was losing the ability to breath. And she had knots in her stomach. She needed to calm down. THIS was not her she was becoming an emotional mess. And suddenly she felt the need to be near her children. She wanted to be in all of their presences and know that they were safe. She had no idea where Charles was at the moment, but she could spend time with the children that were around.

Lily pulled out her phone and started dialing "Hello Serena, What are you and Erick doing now?" she asked into her phone.

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Blair looked at the door Lily had just evacuated and she was fuming. No one cared about Chuck but her and she was all alone in this. She could handle it she told herself. If no one wanted to help her find Chuck and bring him home she would just have to do it herself. She quickly grabbed her bag before storming out of the office. She had a new mission brewing in her brain; Find Chuck Bass and Bring Him Home

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Erick watched Serena as she quickly closed her phone "Who was that?" he asked confused. And Serena shook her head she was a bit confused herself about exactly who the person on the phone had been.

"Mom" she answered" she says she wants us to come home now because she wants to spend quality time with us" she added and Erick's eyebrows rose up in wonder.

"Quality time, she must have a new boyfriend of fiancé already" he responded sarcastically. His mom was so full of it he thought because she changed men the way women changed clothes.

" She assured me that it was nothing like that and that she just misses us" Serena said shaking her head." Anyway, I told her we were on the way so hurry with your sandwich so that we leave this place, get there and get this, whatever it is over as soon as possible" She added as she hurriedly eat the last of her fries before going into her bag to pull out her credit card so that she could pay for lunch.

Erick nodded and ate as fast as he could. He was so over this.

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Blair sat across from her very own private investigator." So, what exactly do you need to get started?" she asked. 'The lady looked at her and smirked "What do you have?" she asked.

Blair shook her head" Nothing really, If I did I would have pursued my own avenues", "He was here one night about a month ago. His dad had just died and he'd been distraught. I held him in my arms all night. I was trying to comfort him" she said but it was so soft it was as if she was there in the moment reliving the incident. "When I woke up the next morning, he wasn't here. He left a crazy note saying I deserve better than him and asking me not to look for him and all that time I didn't. I was trying to follow his wishes. Then I started to receive phone calls from an anonymous caller about two weeks ago. I believed it to be him but there was never any proof because who ever it was just held the phone…breathing and then this morning he spoke to me."

"How can you be so sure it was him" the private investigator asked the teen. It was a valid question she had said that all of the calls had been from an unknown caller." It was him!" Blair all but yelled. "I know his voice. I could never mistake it" she added.

The private investigator exhaled harshly and ran her hands through her hair.

"Okay I will do my best to find him" She said and Blair nodded in relief she finally had a little hope." Now, you said he calls your cell phone. I am going to have a tap placed on it so if he calls again we can have a better idea of his location and also I am going to need to borrow your phone for a few hours. I want to have one of my people analyze it and see if we can get something on the numbers he's called from before"

"Yes, sure whatever you want" Blair assured the lady. She went in her bag and retrieved the phone than handed it to the woman.

The lady smiled as she begin to exit and stopped turning back around " Oh, and a I will expect the first payment in my account by this afternoon "she added before leaving a very hopeful Blair behind her.


	7. Chapter 7

LSP chapter 7

Hello everyone I am back! Please leave comments and uh some of the hospital stuff may seem a little vague. I just wanted to take e the time and say that it is like that because I don't really have a clue of how the hospitals would deal with this type of case so it is really fictional and a figment of my imagination. Thanks again to all the people that took the time to review and add me to fav story and or authors list.

Now on with the chapter!

"OK! What have we got here?" the Emergency room doctor asked the resident intern in a rush of words as he assessed the patient. "Young male 17 or 18, no identification, overdose pulse rate is low, breathing shallow" the doctor nodded. "Prep for stomach pump. Is there anyone with him?" he asked the young attending resident student who shook his head no. He was found at a nearby hotel by one of the maids she did not know what he'd taken" the doctor nodded and exited the room to begin to prepare for the procedure

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Lily paused in her light breakfast morning conversation with her two children and answered her cell phone. It had been weeks since she'd heard from her private investigator and she couldn't afford to miss this call. "Excuse me "she said to Serena and Erick before dismissing herself from the table and heading to Bart's office to have this private conversation.

"We've found him he's in a local hospital in Brooklyn recovering from an overdose" Lily frowned and exhaled sharply. She was trying to get her thoughts together. "An overdose?" she asked. She was shocked. We'll actually, when she thought about it she was really wasn't all that shocked. Charles was known for her perchance for debauchery; add to that the stress of the past month and it was actually very believable. "What's the address?" She asked as she exited the apartment without a word to her other two children.

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Rufus frowned as he looked up from his guitar to see Lily storming into his apartment. She looked frazzled and her face was wet. She'd been crying. He placed his guitar down softly on the sofa and hastily stood to greet her. "What's going on?" he asked as she ran towards him and hugged him tightly. She was almost strangling him with the force of the hug. What's going on?" he whispered into her ear. And she shook her head, wiped the newly formed tears from her face with the white silk handkerchief which she had been clutching tightly in her hands. She sat down on the sofa that he had just vacated and took a moment to regain her composure. "I just got a call from my private investigator. Apparently Charles is back in town and in the hospital recovering from an overdose." She said her voice shaky as more tears were released from her eyes despite her great efforts to stop them.

Rufus hurriedly grabbed his jacket and pulled Lily up from the sofa. "Well come on" he said "Let's go see about our son. Lily held his hand tightly and allowed him to lead her to her chauffeured Limousine that was waiting outside the apartment for them.

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Lily and Rufus entered the hospital and headed to the front desk. "I'm looking for my son" Lily all but screamed at the front desk worker who did not seem to be paying any attention to her. Excuse me" she tried again as she moved around the desk so that she was standing directly in of the lady behind the desk. The hospital worker looked up at Lily and acknowledged her presence after a beat "My son!" Lily repeated. "What's his name?" the lady asked as she positioned her hands in front of her computer ready to type. "Uhhhh Bass, .Charles" Rufus stated before Lily got the chance. They watched anxiously as she typed the name into the computer.

"There is no one by that name in the system" the information desk clerk stated mater of factley as she turned and resumed organizing her forgotten files. Lily leaned over the desk as close as she could get to the desk worker "Listen Miss… My son is here! I have been giving that information by a very reliable source. So, you will get back on your computer and you will do whatever it is you do and you will tell me exactly where I can find my child! Or, you can start looking for new employment because you won't have a job to come back to this time tomorrow" Lily said in a rush of hush angry words.

The lady was taken aback and stunned silent for a minute. "Do you uhh….have a description of him?" She asked "and do you happen to know what he was brought in for?" Lily nodes and pushed her hair back from her face "yes" she stated "an overdose about 4 hours ago. He's has a fair complexion, 18 almost 19. He'll 19 in a couple of months. He has dark hair…."

The nurse typed in the information and pulled up the patient on her screen "Yes 18 year old Caucasian male overdose about 5 hours ago. He is recovering in the psych ward under suicide watch" she said. She pulled out a piece of paper and wrote down the hospital room and floor. "You can find him here "she said. She then went in her file cabinet and pulled out a stack of papers. "You may want to get started on this so that we can fully process him" she said to as she handed Rufus and Lily the big stack of insurance information papers.

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Lily and Rufus Stood outside of Chucks door for about 15 minutes before deciding to take the plunge and enter. And when they finally did enter the room, Lily found herself again trying to hold back tears. Chuck was totally out of it. He had oxygen cords connected to his nose he looked so young like Lily had never been given the chance to see before. Lily seated herself on the side of him and pulled the chair closer to the bed. She hesitantly raised her hand and then gently ran it through her baby's' hair. She never had the chance to do that before and she had a feeling she might never get the chance again. "He looks so young" she said never taking her eyes off of Charles. Rufus did not respond. He too was overwhelmed by being in such close proximity to Charles Bass he had never had the chance before. "We can't tell him Rufus" Lily said removing her hand from the sleeping boys face. "We can't he'll never forgive us and I can't deal with that" she whispered. Rufus did not respond. He did not think he could deal with not telling him. But he stood and said nothing.

Next Blair learns what has happened to Chuck and Chuck wakes up!


	8. Chapter 8

LSP 8

Lily had been sitting in the dark hospital room with her son. The room was so silent and dark. The only light emitting from the room came from the small muted television that was attached to the hospital wall. She found the silence comforting, it allowed her to relax in her uncomfortable hospital chair and contemplate her next move. Lily let her eyes roam over her son once more. He looked so different, almost innocent with the lights from the television bouncing off of his face highlighting his sharp angles. Chuck had been sleeping so still the entire time she'd been there. It was almost midnight now and had it not been for the constant beep of the machines that he was hooked to scrutinizing his stats she would have thought he was no longer alive.

She glanced across the room at Rufus. He was still sitting seated in the chair on the other side of their son's bed asleep. She'd offered him the chance to go home and get some rest hours ago but he refused to take it. So, here they were waiting patiently for their son to come back to them. Lily glanced at the sleeping child once more and she couldn't resist the urge to reach out and touch him. She reached out her hand once more and ran her fingers through his hair, she needed to touch him, feel his warmth and reassure herself that that he was indeed okay.

She had just finished the process of pushing his dark hair away from his face when he stirred, then moaned in pain he coughed and gagged causing Rufus to jump up from his seat now fully awake."You're oaky" Rufus whispered to a very confused Charles who did not even seem to notice that he was there. He patted his son on the arm and pushed the call button for the nurse.

Lily gasped and felt tears once again began to sting her eyes. She was so happy her son was awake.

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Blair moaned when her cell phone rang. It was almost midnight who the hell would call her she wondered as she reached over to answer her phone. She had just gotten into bed about twenty minutes ago and she was so not in the mood to get out just yet.

She paused when she looked over and saw the private investigators name that she'd hired came up on her screen. All former thoughts asleep evaporated from her mind as she answered her phone as fast as she could.

"Hello did you find something?" she asked as soon as the phone was to her ear. She sighed in relief when she was told that Chuck had been found sometime this morning only to find her heart skip a beat when she was then told that he was currently at a hospital in Brooklyn recovering from an overdose. She dressed as quickly as possible, and tried to control her tears as she left her home and headed to the hospital to see about Chuck.

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"So how is he doctor?" Lily asked. She and Rufus were both standing outside the busy hospital room while a flux of nurses attended to Chuck.

The doctor sighed he hated these types of emergency cases because alone with the good news that the patient had survived the overdose came the bad news the incident might not have been accidental and the patient might in fact be suicidal and would require a full mental stability test to determine whether they were at risk again for such behavior. Most families were in denial and couldn't face the fact that their family member wanted to end their own life.

"We'll he came in some time this morning he had overdose on Triazolam which is used as a sedative to treat severe or debilitating insomnia. But it was taken off the market in many countries a while ago and only acceptable in low doses in America. Charles doesn't have a prescription for the stuff anywhere in his medical records and we don't even know where he would have gotten his hands on the stuff." Lily sighed "Well Charles has…resources so it's no telling" she added. The doctor nodded his head in a sign of understanding. He figured as much when he'd seen the patients name and medical records. "We'll when can we take him home?" Lily asked she was so ready to leave this hospital. She hated hospitals. The doctor frowned this was the hard part. "It won't be soon" the doctor informed the seemingly concerned parents. "We have to watch him for signs of a reaction and the drugs he took have been known to cause strange behavior and in some instances violent reactions." Lily exhaled sharply but the doctor continued "Charles seems fine but, we want to watch him closely for a few days to make sure he is okay. We uh… also want to talk to you about admitting your son for psychological evaluation we have reason to believe that the incident may have been intentional" the doctor stopped talking Lily was furious. "My son would not try to take his own life. He love s life you know nothing about my child" she yelled at the doctor causing people in the hallway to stop and take notice.

"So if he is evaluated and its determined that he is in fact suicidal, what do we do then?" Rufus asked he was calmer. More in control. "We are not committing my son. I've had to do this once with my younger son and I will not go down this road again. No!" Lily said his voice shaking but calmer. "Lily listen to the doctor he's trying to help Chuck" Rufus told her she was not being reasonable.

"I have the final say right?" Lily asked. The doctor rechecked the files and returned his gaze to Lily.

"It says here that you Lily Bass are the step mother and only living relative of Charles Bass so yes, you would have some say but if he's deemed mentally unstable we would still have to treat him in some type of facility to insure his health" the doctor responed and both Lily and Rufus were left at a lost for words.

TBC

Next Blair comes to the hospital and Lily talks with Chuck


	9. Chapter 9

LSP 9

The doctor had left them standing in the hallway in front of Chucks room a little while ago and Lily and Rufus had just been standing looking at the swarming activity that was going on in their sons room they had both yet to say a word to each other. They were still standing in the hallway 15 minutes later when the nurse came out and informed them that Chuck was awake but, they could go in and sit with him if they wanted to.

Rufus walked around Lily and was headed into the room promoting Lily to speak to him for the first time since the doctor had vacated their presence. "What do you think you're doing?" she asked Rufus her voice angry but soft stopping him dead in his tracks. She walked towards the hospital door and pulled it closed as lightly as she could. She did not want Charles to hear the conversation that was about to take place.

Rufus frowned a bit aggravated and turned around to face Lily. His stance said that he was ready to fight with her but his mouth said nothing. He walked back towards Lily and stood in front of her once more waiting for whatever blow she was about to throw at him.

"I don't think it would be a good idea for you to go into that room now that Charles is awake" she said softly. She was trying to keep her cool and keep her emotions in check but it was clear from the little crease around her mouth that came from her holding her jaw closed too tight that she was upset with him.

"What is this Lil?" he asked his voice demanding and loud. He had just found his son and he was not about to let Lily take him away again the way that she did first time. "It's just …Charles has no idea that we are his biological parents and with everything that has happened I think that it would be best that you leave. We do not need to spring this at him on top of everything else!" She added. She was trying to soften the blow by speaking her words as low and soft as she could muster but her desperation was slipping through each word that she spoke. She was a bit angry at Rufus for not taking her side about the mental institution thing but, she genuinely didn't want to hurt him. She cared for him deeply after all he was the father of her child.

"So what? Am I supposed to just walk away and never look back… the way did you when you gave him up?" Rufus asked he was getting angrier by the minute. "I am not arguing with you Rufus" Lily responded.

"I'm trying to do this the easy way by asking you to walk away but, if you want…I can do it the hard way. You are not going in that room Rufus, even if I have to have a guard stand in front of that door."

Rufus opened his mouth to respond but he was in such a state of shock that he couldn't even process his words in any type of fashion that would have made sense.

" I'm sorry Rufus" Lily continued " I don't want to hurt you but I have to protect my son by any means necessary and you going in there would be nothing but an unwanted stress that Charles would not be able to deal with right now. So, I am asking you nicely please leave".

She watched Rufus for a couple of moments more till he had exited the vicinity. Then she exhaled a deep breath and mentally prepared herself to go head to head with Chuck.

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When Lily entered the room she found Charles very much awake and starring at the ceiling. She exhaled loudly once more and moved to go closer to him. She pulled the chair closer to his bed and was about to take a seat when he suddenly removed his glare from the ceiling and beamed it at her.

She forced her body to remain calm and she sat down beside him. He shook his head in disdain and returned his stare to the ceiling.

"Charles honey? Are you comfortable?" She asked her voice soft. She reached out her hand and pushed his hair from his face and still he said nothing, he just let her do it.

Lily took the moment to take in his appearance once more. He was pale and hooked up to all types of machines. He looked so awful. She was finding it hard just being around him because he appeared so fragile. She was not used to seeing him like this. She had no idea what to say or even how to be around him now that she knew. She had no idea how to be a parent to him and that idea alone brought tears to her eyes once more.

"I spoke with your doctor" she continued softly "he says that you are going to be fine." She assured him. He said nothing. She pulled her hand back and laid it in her lap. "If you want to talk about it… You know why you did it…I'm here" she said to him causing him to bring his attention back to her.

He sniffed and she noticed that he had tears in his eyes but he was trying his best not to let them fall. "Charles" Lily said calling his name softly he seemed softer somehow almost timid and she did not want to scare him or provoke him in any way that would make him feel even anymore uncomfortable or lash out at her.

"I didn't mean to. I wanted to sleep" he said after a beat and his voice was hoarse and heavy with exhaustion. Lily nodded and reached her hand up to grab his hand and he did not move his hand back so they were sitting in the almost dark room holding hands. "I'm sorry if I hurt you. I didn't mean to. What happened between me and Bart has nothing to do with me and you "she said. He nodded and they sat in silence for hours before he finally fell back asleep and Lily allowed her eyed to close not long after his did and within moments they were both sleeping and she was still holding his hand.

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Blair entered the hospital room and gasped at the sight before her. Chuck was hooked up to all types of machines, paler then she'd ever seen him before. Lily was sitting on a chair that was pushed as close to Chuck's bed as it could possibly get and she was holding hands and they were both asleep.

Blair was about to exit the room and let them sleep when Lily stirred and looked up to find Blair there.

"I really need to hire security to guard his door" she said airily as she sat up straighter in her chair and turned her attention to Blair. "How did you find out?" Lily asked Blair who was still standing in the door way.

"I hired someone" Blair responded and Lily laughed. "You two are so much alike" she said more to herself then to Blair.

"Come in. Have a seat. You've done so much worrying I think you deserve to be here" Lily said to Blair before standing up from her chair. She walked towards the door and turned her attention back to Blair.

"I'll uh give you some to time with him. I have to make some calls I'll just be outside the door" she said before exiting the room closing the door softly and leaving Blair alone with Chuck

I am sorry if Chuck did not seem in character, but he just woke up, and he's alone and scared he almost died. That kind of experience changes a guy you know so he just might be different and then again maybe not. Lol

Next: Blair and Chuck talk if you could call it that and Lily hires security to guard her son's room. Serena and Erick find out what happen to Chuck and Rufus confides in Dan!


	10. Chapter 10

LSP 10

Rufus stormed into his loft and slammed the door as hard as he could. He was beyond upset. She was willing to hire security to stand in front of Chuck's door in order to keep him away. She was crazy he thought to himself as he plopped down on his sofa.

"Wow that was dramatic dad" Dan said as he stood awkwardly and took in his father's appearance. He looked bad, really bad. "What's going on your behaving like a petulant child?" Dan said as he sat himself down besides his father on the sofa.

Rufus was stumped he leaned further into the sofa and reached across to pick up his abandoned guitar. He sighed and begins to pluck the strings softly with no particular sound in mind (something that he only did when he was really stressed or upset). "Dad, you can tell me. I'm not a little kid anymore and who knows I might be able to help you through this" Dan pleaded with his father softly. If his father was this upset then it had to be bad because the last time that he'd seen his father this upset had been when his mother had called and stated that she did not really want to come back after all.

"I would rather not get into it" Rufus said as he gently placed his guitar down on the coffee table and suddenly stood. "Because, trust me son once you know, there's no going back and you can't not know." Rufus whispered and Dan was shocked when his father's eyes began to slowly fill with tears.

"Now I'm worried. Does this have something to do with mom, or maybe Jenny?" Dan asked and Rufus shook his head. "I wish" he responded softly and then he stood staring blankly at son. Dan nodded, "Its Lily isn't it?" Rufus was silent not answering the question.

"It is" Dan continued. "Your new relationship with Lily is not going as planned and your upset about it" Rufus remained silent. "What happened? Did you realize that her world is filled with nothing but rich mindless zombies who infect everyone around them?" Dan asked he was trying to make a joke and lighten the mood because he hated to see his father upset. "Seriously dad, what's going on you can tell me I can handle it" Rufus nodded and moved to sit once again beside his son.

"Lily and I have a son together…An Uh child that her mother convinced her to give up for adoption. She never told me about him" Dan frowned "You two have a son?" he asked softly he was a bit confused and hurt that he did not know this. "I just found out about a month ago, but up utile a few weeks ago I had no idea who he was, or where he was, or how….how he was being reared", Rufus paused to compose himself. He could feel his composer seeping away at the seams.

" I convinced Lily to help me find him and she hired a private investor who revealed some alarming news….that neither Lily or I was prepared for" Dan shook his head and looked towards the door then back at his father. " What did the private investigator reveal dad?" he asked softly he'd come this far into the murky waters of the truth he'd might as well continue to the black revelation that his father was about to reveal.

"The private investigator turned up proof that our son has been right under our noses all along" Rufus said he just didn't want to say exactly who his son was because he knew how much Dan disliked Chuck.

"Who is he? My brother, who is he?" Dan asked his voice raised a notch at the end his dad was being selective with what he was choosing to reveal and it was making Dan really anxious.

"I want to tell you son I do but I don't think I should" Dan scoffed "You started this so finish it. Dad who is my brother" Rufus exhaled deeply and looked at his son. "It's uh Charles, Charles Bass" he said softly then he watched in horror as Dan stood suddenly from the sofa and excited the house with a loud bang of the door.

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"I need someone to be in front of my son's hospital room constantly, around the clock" Lily stated into her cellular phone. She'd been doing her best to find adequate security for Chuck's room since she'd stepped out of his hospital room to allow Blair some time with Chuck.

"Yes, he's in the hospital and I don't want anyone to know so secrecy is a top priority. If this gets out to the tabloids it would be even more stress on Charles then their already is. I don't want that.

She stopped and listened to her assistant as she repeated back all the instructions that Lily had just given her. "Yes, exactly" Lily responded "When is the earliest you can have the Guards here? " Lily asked into the phone and she smiled when her assistant assured her that she could have someone there by the end of the day.

She hung up her phone and proceeded to call her daughter. She hadn't spoken to her and she wanted to let her know that she'd found Charles.

Serena exhaled a sigh of relief when she saw her mother's number flash across her phones screen. "Mom, Where are you?" she asked before Lily could get a word in "There are cameras around the penthouse they are looking for information on Chuck apparently Gossip Girl caught pictures of him being wheeled into the hospital this morning and they are reporting that he could be dead" she said into the phone her voice breaking and hitching on the end. Chuck wasn't her favorite person in the world, but, she didn't want him to be dead either.

Lily frowned. This had just gotten a hundred percent more complicated. She ran her hands through her tousled blond hair and tried to think of ways to handle the situation at hand. (Those paparazzi and Gossip Girl really pissed her off sometimes.)I" I can assure you that Charles is not dead, he is in the hospital but he is very much alive" Lily assured her daughter softly.

"I'm sending a car for you and Erik in about an hour I will see you then" she said softly before hanging up the phone. She had to deal with the situation as soon as possible before it got even more out of hand.

Next Blair and Chuck have that talk and Lily tries to handle the situation of the information leak.


	11. Chapter 11

LSP 11

Blair sat in the dark dank over sterilized hospital room watching Chuck sleep. She'd been in there along with him for over twenty minutes and he had yet to even stir. She moved closer to him so that she was almost lying on top of his hospital bed beside him and she studied him closely. He looked different when he was sleeping. He was so much more peaceful as if he didn't have a care in the world. His face was less guarded and the tension was gone and he looked like a little kid. This broke Blair's heart because deep down she knew him.

She knew who and what he really was. She knew that the needy child he pretended not to be for so long was exactly what he was. He was her Chuck Bass and they had so much in common on the inside that it scared her sometimes and she was almost devastated when she realized that the words that she had spoken to him that day were true. She would have and still would stand by him though anything no matter how dark it was. She loved him and sometimes the thought alone caused her pain because she truly did not know if Chuck had it in him to be a person who could return those types of strong feelings.

She watched him breath and felt almost compelled to touch his lips with the tips of her fingers. And, she let her fingers run across his lips and over his high cheek bones he was beautiful. She had just finished moving his hair (that was longer than usual) out from in front of his eyes when he moved and grunting before his eyes popped open.

He stared at her for what seemed like eternity before his eyes blinked as if he was taken aback by her being there. He moaned and frowned and Blair sat back in her chair giving him the space that he craved sometimes.

"Blair?" he asked his voice was a soft whisper and hesitant.

"What are you doing here?" he asked. He didn't sound mad just disappointed. And she knew from the way in which his body tensed and his body language changed to defensive that he did not want her there.

"Well hello to you too" She said her reply sarcastic as she stood up from the chair that she had been occupying.

He remained silent and his gaze left her eyes and returned to the closed hospital door.

"Where is Lily?" he asked her softly and she smirked surprised. She was confused by the question. She couldn't understand why Chuck would even care where Lily was. It just was not like him.

" She had to step out" Blair replied her voice soft and hurt as her gaze left his eyes and turned to the door. She was hoping Lily would return soon because she was starting to feel a little uncomfortable.

Chuck nodded and returned his gaze to Blair "Oh I just thought she'd be here" he said softly and the room returned to an awkward silence when neither Chuck nor Blair could think of the appropriate thing to say to each other.

"So…..how are you feeling?" Blair asked after a beat she was at a loss for words. Chuck stared at her before exhaling and turning his glare away from her and to the ceiling.

"Well if you don't want to talk I suppose we could just sit here, in silence, together, just the two of us."

Chuck looked at her again and rolled his eyes. "You don't have to stay Blair I told you before you are not"

"Your girlfriend?!" Blair finished for him she was upset she knew that. Why did he have to keep rubbing it in her face?

"I know" she whispered softly "but, that does not change the fact that I love you" she declared again causing Chuck to flinch and sit up higher in his bed.

"I think it would be best if you left" he told her softly now looking down at the bed covers ignoring her gaze completely. He couldn't look at her, if he did he'd crumble and give in a he couldn't afford to do that to her.

He was not worthy of her love.

Blair stood from her chair and her face cracked completely, right there, in front of him and he was almost undone.

"I'll leave she said but that does not change the fact that I love you. It just makes it hurt more" she said softly as tears spilled from her eyes, right before she quickly grabbed her belonging and exited the room in a rush.

She had been cursed to fall in love with the one guy who would quite possibly never love her back.

GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG

Lily picked up her phone and dialed the family Bass industries Publicist to do damage control.

"I need to gain control of the issue at hand. My son future control of Bass Industries is in the hospital and it's been place on a website and gossip columns called Gossip Girl that he could possibly be dead. It's not true and I don't want the information to be released and spread any further so, what I need is a Press Release that says yes Charles is in the hospital and is stable. I need this to be done ASAP. My son is delicate and I don't think he could handle a scandal like this" She said into her phone

She was assured that the matter would be dealt with and she had just hung up her phone when Blair came fleeing out of the Chucks room in tears.

"Great, that just what everyone needs" she said to herself as she took in the scene that Blair was making. Several people were surrounding her taking her picture with their cell phones and she didn't even seem to notice.

Lily frowned and shook head before returning to her son's room to make sure that he was okay. She would have Serena check on Blair later. She had to Check on Charles and make sure that he was okay.

After all he was her son and he came first.


	12. Chapter 12

**LSP 12**

**Just in, B was seen practically running from C's hospital room. Was he dead? Was he alive? Or was he just his usual asshole self? Who knows, but one thing's for sure B was a crying mess. Any ideas of what's going on or what happened give me a hit but until then the pictures will just have to be enough! Once again C leaves B a mess!**

**XOXO**

**Gossip Girl**

After reading the message Serena closed her red phone and turned in the limo to face her brother. "This is getting out of hand" she whispered to Erick who in turn, flipped his phone closed before nodding his head in agreement.

They both looked at the hospital with something akin to horror in their eyes. One thing was a fact, Chuck was there the Gossip Girl blast announced it earlier that day and their mother had pretty much confirmed it by sending the limo and bring them there.

"I hope it's not as bad as everyone is making it seem" Erick said to Serena right before the both exited the Limo and headed into the hospital entrance.

GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,

Dan stood in front the door of Nathanial's penthouse. "What am I doing here?" he asked himself and he was just turned intent on heading home when he ran right into Nate. "I'm so sorry" Dan whispered before turning and walking as fast as he could in the opposite direction.

Nate frowned confused then turned to stop Dan's retreat calling out to him. Dan paused in his fast past escape walk and slowly turned to face Nate.

"What's up Man?" Nate asked a smile on his face. He and Dan weren't best friends or anything, but they weren't enemies either.

"Nothing I just wanted to ask you a few questions, that's all but if you're busy or something than that's okay! I can ask another time because you look like you might be busy or you, you're just getting home so you might want to relax……I'm sorry. I'll leave now" Dan said in a rush of words before hurriedly turning to leave.

"Dan, what's up? It's cool. You can ask me your questions come on" Nate said as he waved Dan into his home quickly.

Dan entered the house and looked around everything was so clean and perfect. It was like everything had its place and it was too much. He was beginning to lose his nerves. He so did not want to be here now.

"So, what did you want to ask me?' Nate said as he sat on the sofa and Dan reluctantly took a seat beside him. Dan exhaled and rubbed his hand nervously across his eyebrow.

"Well, I wanted to ask you questions about your friend Chuck Bass" Dan whispered softly

Nate frowned and looked at Nate for a few second before he responded.

"Why" he asked Dan. He hoped it wasn't some kind of investigative journalism attempt because he was so not with that type of thing.

"It's it is nothing too personal I was just wondering, what type of person he really is you know. I mean you're his best friend and you would most likley know him better than anyone else and I've always wondered if the sleazy, elitist personality that he gives off was a truly genuine"

Nate looked Dan over and he didn't sense any malice in the question but still, he did not want to give personal information about his best friend to Dan.

"It's okay you don't have to tell me anything. It was wrong of me to ask but I didn't know who else would be able to answer such a question" Dan responded when he noticed the way Nate froze at the question.

Nate shook his head and turned to face Dan "What are you planning?" he asked Dan shook his head and stood. He was walking towards the exit when his phone vibrating in his pocket began to buzz.

A few seconds later, Nate phone buzzed and he flipped it open and stood in shock at the Gossip Girl blast about Chuck with the pictures of a crying Blair at the bottom.

"Oh my God" Dan whispered and moved once again to leave the apartment. He was almost at the door when Nate stopped him once again.

"What do you know?" He asked and his stare was none relenting. Dan stood in front of Nate totally at a loss for words. He didn't know what to say all he knew was that he wanted to go to the hospital as fast as he could to check on his brother.

GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,G,GG,GG

Lily Stood in Chuck's room arranging the flowers that she had ordered in different location all around the room. She had been doing it for about thirty minutes now and the entire time Chuck had been silent staring up at the muted television seemingly not even noticing that she was there.

"What do you think about me putting the Hydrangeas right here on the left side of your bed" she asked. She was trying to engage Chuck because she did not really know him all that well but she did know the he was not the quiet silent type.

"Do whatever you like" he responded. He never let his eyes leave the television. Lily frowned causing small frown lines to appear near her closed mouth. She straightens from her position arranging the flowers and turned to face Chuck.

"Serena and Erick are on their way up to see you. Wouldn't that be nice?" she asked and Chuck shook his head in the negative.

"I don't want anymore visitors today. I just want to be left alone" he said. His voice was soft but there was no mistaking the irritation that was there hidden in the soft seemingly mellow words.

"But, maybe if you have visitors you can talk to them and that might make you feel better." Lily said. She was trying to stop him from retreating into himself the way he was because after a suicide attempt, that couldn't be healthy.

"I'm talking to you and I don't feel any better than I did when I took the pills" he said before releasing a soft laugh that had Lily rethinking her decision on the menatal work up.

"Well uh" she paused. She couldn't think of a response to that.

"I guess I'll just leave you alone for a while so that you can rest and I'll be right outside the door and if you need me." She stopped and headed towards the door.

"I'll be right outside the door" she repeated before exciting and leaving Chuck in the room alone.

Maybe this was going to be harder then she thought.


	13. Chapter 13

LSP 13

Lily took another sip of her disgusting, dark, bitter hospital coffee and almost gagged. She had been sitting in the hospital chair right outside of Chuck's room for the past thirty minutes and she still wasn't sure if she was fully prepared to go back in. She was in way over her head she decided after deep thought.

She was barely able to handle Erick after his incident and he was a way easier child to get along with than Chuck. She was at a lost and she had no idea what to do next.

Chuck had been so harsh with her and she wasn't sure she could handle any more. She sighed and ran her hands through her hair.

This whole situation was a total mess and now Serena and Eric were seated beside her and they were wanting answers about their brother that she was unprepared to answer because to be honest she was not really sure what was happening.

"Mom" Serena called pulling Lily out of her trance. Lily exhaled placed her coffee down on the table in front of her and turned her full attention towards her daughter.

She forced a thousand watt smile onto her face and patted her daughter on the shoulder.

"Yes dear?" she asked her voice soft

Serena rolled her eyes and exhaled sharply "What in the world is going on with Chuck and why can't we see him?" she asked in a rush of words.

Lily rolled her shoulders and straightened in her seat "Charles says he doesn't want visitors so…. So, I'm sitting out here until he decides that he does." Lily said softly

Serena frownd and turned to Erick. "That could take forever" she said her voice seemingly exhausted before she grabbed her brother by the hand. She pulled him up from his seat besides his mother and started walking towards the elevator.

"Erick and I are going for a walk and to grab a bite to eat. We'll be back" Serena said quickly before dragging Erick away with her out of the hallway and onto the elevator.

GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG

Erick watched his sister silently as she pounded on the elevator numbers almost impatiently.

"Where are we going?" he asked his sister and she pounded on the number one once more before answering his question.

"We are going to Blair's I want to make sure she's okay. I've been texting her since Gossip Girl and The Media released the pictures this morning. She hasn't responded" Serena confessed the worry seeping from her eyes. Her forehead was slightly creased in worry.

Erick nodded and leaned back against the cold, elevator metal letting the elevator support his weight. "Yeah that sounds like a good idea" he said just before the elevator opened on the bottom floor revealing the swarm, mob of paparazzi. Serena and Erick were taken aback when the crowd of people was instantly attacking them with flashes of light that was so bright that Serena and Erick were both finding it difficult to see anything at all.

Serena knocked an extended microphone out of her face and pushed Erick behind her so that he wouldn't be attacked by the vultures that were trapping them.

Serena froze for a moment as the fight or flight instinct suddenly over took her.

Luckily for the Paparazzi she chose the flight mode she grabbed Erick by the hand before hurriedly pressing the close elevator button so that they could exit the circus and head back towards their mother.

When the elevator door closed Erick sighed in relief and turned to see Serena who was still standing in shock.

"This is crazy!" she whispered and all Erick could do was nod in agreement because things were getting totally out of hand and it was crazy.

GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,

_**Hello, I'm Tamara Gray and this is channel 36 news and we are standing here outside of the most prestigious hospital in New York where it is reported that Young Orphan Billionaire Bass is now residing after a near fatal suicide attempt that was reported to have taken place earlier this morning or late last night. **_

The reporter walked towards the crowd of hospital doctor as they were reentering the facility coming from a lunch break and threw the microphone in one of the men's face after reading his name tag.

_**Dr Parker, we hear from reliable sources that you were one of the admitting attending doctors treating Charles Bass, How is he doing now?**_

"_**No Comment" the doctor replied before making a quick retreat, walking as fast as he could into the hospital.**_

Lily stood from her chair and frowned in pure outrage. She could not believe this! Someone it seemed had leaked to the media that Chuck was in this particular hospital for a suicide attempt. The information was currently playing on the hospital waiting room television and the longer the story continued the angrier she felt herself becoming. She shook her head. She could not believe this. It, this situation was becoming total paparazzi frenzy and Charles would defiantly not be able to handle this.

Lily had just pulled out her phone when Serena and Erick came running towards her exiting the elevator as quickly as they could.

"Mom!" Serena breathed, she was frantic and she was out of breath. She looked scared and completely outraged perhaps even more so than Lily.

"I know" Lily said as she walked towards Chuck's room with Erick and Serena following close behind her. She walked towards the door and the security guards separated and took a step to the side to allow her entrance. She opened the door quietly then took a cautious look inside the dark quiet room and breathed a sigh of relief when she saw that Chuck was sleeping peacefully. A smile appeared on her face. At least he didn't know what was happening. As long as she could contain things she would still be able to protect him.

She had been so scared that he'd have seen the news airing that she had almost not been able to breathe and now slowly her breath was coming back to her. It left her exhausted. She closed the hospital door just as the doctors were walking towards her.

"We're so sorry an intern leaked the news" The head doctor said in a rush of words. Lily shook her head in contempt and raised her hand to hush the doctor.

"I want the television removed from his room immediately and just so you know my lawyers will be getting in contact with you" she said before turning and walking towards the elevator, but her anger was now boiling these incompetent people were causing more disturbance to her sons life. "What type of facility is this any way?" She seethed "My child is in that room suffering, His father just died, he almost died! And this hospital can't even keep things confidential!" She all but yelled. She was trying her best to control her temper, but she could feel her body shaking. She forced her body to turn back around and once more she begins walking towards the elevator leaving three very distressed doctors in her wake.

Serena and Erick hurried to follow their mother as she made her way onto the elevator.

"Where are you going?" Mom Serena asked

"I'm going to make a public announcement so that I can diffuse the situation a bit" Lily said her voice soft. "I want you and Erick to stay here with your brother, Ugh Charles until I get back. And Please Serena, Please, I beg you don't mention any of this to Charles and try not to upset him. He's been through enough"

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Next: Chuck, Erick and Serena in a hospital room. Dan talks to Serena, and where exactly is Blair?


	14. Chapter 14

LSP 14  
For you I was a flame  
Love is a losing game  
Five story fire as you came  
Love is a losing game  
One I wish I never played  
Oh what a mess we made  
And now the final frame  
Love is a losing game

Blair found herself sitting on her bed listening to Amy Wine house on repeat. Usually she wouldn't be caught dead playing the psychos music but the lyrics to "Love is a Losing Game" was almost mirroring her life at the moment.

So, she was forcing herself to listen to it as she lay back on her fully made bed in the completely dark room. And, she was allowing herself to lie in the pain for a while until she could figure out what to do next, and, she was cutting herself off from the world until she could figure out a way to handle the Chuck situation because at the moment she was all out of ideas.

Played out by the band  
Love is a losing hand  
more than I could stand  
Love is a losing hand

Self professed... profound  
Till the chips were down  
...known you're a gambling man  
Love is a losing hand

Okay, Chuck didn't want to see her she reminded herself once again. That realization hurt, and it made her simple task of breathing difficult and even with that fact she still wanted him and she couldn't get him off her mind. She saw him when she closed her eyes, she could feel him all around her and it was like she was cursed in not being able to escape him.

She knew she had to do something but, she did not know what so she lay on her bed in the dark and listened to her Amy while she tried to formulate a plan.

Though I'm rather blind  
Love is a fate resigned  
Memories mar my mind  
Love is a fate resigned

Over futile odds  
and laughed at by the gods  
and now the final frame  
Love is a losing game

GG, GG, GG, GG, GG, GG, GG, GG, GG, GG, GG, GG,

Chuck opened his eyes and then closed them again. He faintly caught the beep of the hospital machinery and groaned from deep within his throat. So he was still here and this was not a horrible nightmare.

He forced himself to once again open his eyes and he exhaled sharply when he noticed that he was not alone in his room. "I thought I'd made it very clear that I didn't want any visitors." He whispered causing the room's occupants to sit up suddenly.

"You're awake!" Serena announced her screechy voice echoed in Chucks head and caused an instant headache. This is just great he thought to himself. "We've been here for over four hours and you hadn't even stirred, we were we were beginning to think you were comatose" Erick whispered as he walked closer to the bed and looked down at Chuck.

"Are you Okay?" Erick asked suddenly when Chuck did not respond to his first comment. And Chuck nodded his head to confirm that he was but instantly regretted it when his vision swam black for a moment and his head beginning throbbing even more.

"Water" Chuck groaned out his voice thick with pain and Serena suddenly grabbed the pitcher that contained the warm water at the side of the bed. She filled the plastic hospital cup that was also sitting on the side table with the liquid and handed the liquid to Chuck as quickly as she could.

Chuck gulped the water as fast as he could and then placed the cup back down on the table. "I feel like shit" Chuck admitted as he allowed his body to press down into the thin, cheep mattress. "We'll maybe you'll think twice the next time you decide to down a whole bottle of pills" Erick said softly causing a sudden sharp shriek of "Erick!" from his sister.

Erick shrugged his shoulders in nonchalance" I'm just saying. It wasn't your brightest idea" he added before once again taking his seat in the chair at the side of the bed. Chuck smirked and closed his eyes.

Serena stood closer to the bed and started fluffing the pillows as much as she could from around Chucks head. "Do you need anything, a nurse?"

Chuck exhaled loudly clearly showing his agitation and Serena took the hint and took her seat on the opposite side from Erick. "I just want to be left alone" Chuck added after a beat and he got no response from his siblings.

The three people in the room sat in silence until Chuck finally fell back asleep.

GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,

Lily flinched as another flash of light went off in her face. There were reporters everywhere all trying to get the breaking news on the Baby Bass Billionaire as they had now resorted to calling Chuck and try as she may she couldn't get a word in and there were questions coming from every direction.

"Mrs. Bass? .Mrs. Bass?"

Lily groaned and tried her best to keep her composure. "How is Charles doing at this very moment a reporter yelled out from the sea. " He is doing wonderful!" was Lily response as she turned her head and prepared herself for the next question.

"He had an accident earlier yesterday and he was sent to the local hospital" she added she wanted to get as much of her story out as she could before she was bombarded with more questions." Charles is currently in stable condition and is expected to be released in a couple of days" she smiled her best smiled which quickly turned into a frown when another reporter yelled out his reply.

"We hear that Charles had an overdose and is currently on his death bed. If he dies who will get control of Bass industries?" Lily felt herself growing warm with anger. "He's not going to die as I said before he is doing really well" she sad and moved on to the next question "Yes!" she said to the reporter that was waving his hands in the air for attention.

"Do you think that the suicide attempt could have been prevented if you'd been there for Charles when his father died instead of running around with Rufus Humphrey?" the next reporter asked and Lily felt her hands began to shake

" I…never…" she began but before she could get her statement out the reporter who'd asked the question was holding up pictures of her walking in the park with Rufus on the day of the funeral. "And there are more where that came from" he added a satisfied smirk on his face.

Lily was flabbergasted and she couldn't formulate words." Like I said my son is doing well…Thanks for coming out that's all for today" she said suddenly before leaving the podium as fast as she could before the tears she felt welling in her eyes were able to fall.

A/N I'm almost weary about the press conference thingy I've never done or been to one before but I hope I did okay with it. There will be more Lily and Rufus in the next chapter and please leave comments. Comments stroke the muse! Thanks to everyone who reads in advance. Tell me what u think!

Next: Rufus and Lily have another Chat, Lily is confronted by Dan and Chuck finds out about the Press conference!


	15. Chapter 15

LSP 15

Lily knocked on Rufus door as hard as she could and when it swung open quickly to reveal a tired looking disgruntled Rufus she almost fell into his arms. "I messed up so bad Rufus! And I don't know what to do." Rufus took in a deep breath. No matter how much he wanted to be mad at Lily he always found it difficult and today was no different.

"What happened?" he asked softly and he opened the apartment door wider and steeped back to allow her entrance. Lily sniffed and tears began to pool in her eyes. "It was so horrible! " Lily cried out. "I did a press conference to try to smooth things over for Charles and it went horribly wrong. They were throwing accusations at me saying he wanted to kill himself and I…..couldn't do anything. This evening Serena and Erick were almost tackled by paparazzi trying to get the inside scoop on their brother"

She stopped and seated herself on the sofa placing her hands on her face covering it quickly before removing her hands and groaning loudly. "I'm a terrible mother" she exclaimed loudly. "I don't handle situations with my children correctly and whenever they seem to need me I'm never there". Rufus sat down in a chair across from her and placed his hand on her lap.

"Oh My God Lily!" a voice exclaimed as Jenny and Dan hurriedly walked into the house and stopped mid pace upon seeing Lily. Rufus looked up at his children in shock and took a calming breath. "Dan Would you please take your sister into the other room while Lily and I finish up in here?" Rufus asked his son softly. And Dan shook his head in the negative "You know what" he exclaimed, "Actually I won't I think we should all discuss the situation like a family after all apparently, that's what we are right Lily?" he asked his voice angry almost a full on scream. Lily paused, frowning before turning to face Rufus. "You told them?" She accused "How could you do his to me" she asked right before she quickly stood up from the sofa and started heading towards the door.

"Lily wait" Rufus said trying to stop her from running out into the night upset. "Why would you tell them about this when I asked you not to tell anyone?" Lily asked tears streaming from her eyes. The situation was quickly getting out of hand more and more each second. And she was losing control. She hated to lose control . It was one of her greatest fears.

"He told us because unlike you maybe he doesn't believe in keeping life altering decisions from his children. Rufus sighed and ran his hands through his hair. "Dan, that's enough," he said sharply." That's enough, please take jenny and go to your rooms" he instructed once again. He was trying his best to diffuse the situation.

"What's going on" Jenny asked confused. She was a total lack of knowledge about what was going on. And it was making her angry. "Nothing!" Lily said. "It was so not their business what was going with her child as far as she was concerned.

"Oh. It's something and you're not leaving this house until you tell us what's going on with our brother!" Dan yelled

GG,GG,GG,GG,GGG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG,GG

Chuck frowned as he looked over at the two sleeping occupants in the room. He was bored out of his mind. He had a dull headache and he was beginning to feel a bit claustrophobic. He rolled his eyes a reached over to grab the remote that was sitting on the table. He flipped on the television and laid back on the bed sinking his shoulders into his fluffed pillows.

He flipped through the channels stopping at a Science fiction flick for a couple of moments before losing interest and quickly flipping the channel. He paused; a frown came upon his face when he saw his name at the bottom of the screen of a tabloid show TMZ. They were holding up pictures of his dad laughing, making jokes about his life and his dad.

His body shook with rage they were insulting his family mostly his dad and then the subject moved on to him, or, "Billionaire, Baby, Bass" or whatever the hell it was they were calling him. Chuck almost fell out of the bed when the clips of the Press conference that had taken place only hours ago came onto the screen.

His face felt warm and wet all of a sudden. He licked his lips and tasted salt. His throat was closing up and he could feel a lump in it. He raised his hand to his face and was surprised when he felt moisture. He was crying he realized. His life totally sucked and now the whole world knew the intimate details of his life.

He was finding it hard to breath, and he was now basically almost forcing air in and out of his lungs. He couldn't think. Everything was going black and he barley heard the voice calling his name trying to bring him out of his haze.

Serena pressed the buzzer for the nurse as fast as she could. Chuck was breathing hard and his breaths were erratic and loud. He was seemingly unfocused and he also appeared to be in pain. Serena's loud scream woke Erick and he quickly rushed out of the room. He couldn't believe what was going on Chuck Bass was hyperventilating and having a panic attic.

And as the nurses came running into the room to assist their patient Serena and Erick( who had just called the on duty nurse and come running back in behind her), stood back and watched the commotion in total fear. This was so totally unexpected and out of the norm that both children were in total disbelief.

Serena and Erick were soon pushed out of the hospital room and into the hall way. Serena frowned as she pulled out her phone and dialed her mother. This was getting totally out of hand.


	16. Chapter 16

LSP 16

"I don't, I don't have to take this" Lily stated as she moved around The Humphrey clan and made her way towards the door.

"What's going on dad" Jenny asked as she made her way closer to her father. "What brother?" she asked. Lily's' hand had just touched the door knob when Dan's world filtered through her head

"Chuck" he whispered "Chuck Bass" he continued, "He's our brother and Lily's son"

Lily paused and turned her body back in the direction of the Humphreys who were all standing looking at her as if she'd lost her mind.

"That doesn't leave this room" She said .Her voice was scratchy and shaky but at the same time loud and clear. Her eyes were fierce and fiery and she looked as if she was completely falling apart right in front of their eyes

" We aren't agreeing to anything" Dan said he made his way to Lily and was now standing in front of her looking her dead in the eyes. "You have to tell him", he told her "He deserves to know".

Lily was shaking her head no as tried to control herself. Now was not the time to tell Chuck anything he was in no condition to know.

She wanted to appear strong but she was losing the battle. Her eyes were pooling with salty water and she was all but shaking trying to stop the tears from falling.

"I can't" she whispered "Don't you understand?" she yelled. Then she took a calming breath and exhaled sharply. The tears were now free falling from her eyes and she was shaking

"Charles is….difficult" she whispered "he's… he would never understand this. He is going through enough right now. I can't lie this on him too. It would kill him" she added softly

Dan rolled his eyes and snorted. He couldn't believe this. What she was doing (as far as he was concerned), had nothing to do with hurting Chuck. Lily was just scared that society would find out what she'd done. She didn't want to ruin her reputation, her family name.

"Are you sure that's the reason" Dan asked softly " maybe you don't even care about Chuck Bass at all, after all you gave him away! If you'd wanted him, you would have fought for him. The only thing you care about is status and money. You gave him away because Dad wasn't some millionaire that would fit easily into your planned life."

He paused and took in her stance she was all but crumbling in front of them she was shaking and tears wear falling from her eyes as she cried silently. Dan stuck the knife in

"Why should you get to make all the decisions about what happens to Chuck and about who tells what and when?" he asked "You're not a parent. You're a sorry excuse and you're just scared that when Chuck finds out that he'll agree" he added.

Rufus moved Dan away from Lily and put himself in Dan's place. "Lily" he said softly. This wasn't what he wanted. He never wanted to see Lily hurt. Not ever.

"Dan, Jenny, go to your rooms!" he all but screamed as he wrapped his arms around Lily in an attempt to comfort her. Lily quickly extracted herself from his arms and put as much space between them as she could. Dan and Jenny made a quick exit

And Lily was trembling in his arms "I hoped it wouldn't come to this" she said softly "I asked you for one thing. One thing!" She screamed "but you just couldn't keep this to yourself.

"Now everyone knows" She added. She backing up as she spoke she was angry he realized and shaking with rage. It shocked him. He had never seen her like this.

"You want to play" she bit out her voice soft, her breath deep "We'll play. You should have done what I asked." She said shaking her head in disbelief.

"You'll be sorry" she threatened as she turned quickly and made her exit from the apartment. Rufus flinch as the door slammed loudly and he was left all alone wondering what in the hell had just happened.

Lily's phone rang as she made her way to the limo car that had been waiting outside. She glanced at the screen and did not feel calm enough to talk to her daughter just then. She needed a drink.

"Arthur would you please take me somewhere, where I can get a drink?" she asked softly as she got into the limo. Her phone rang again. Lily sighed deeply and pressed ignore before throwing her Blackberry somewhere deep in her handbag.

She'd call Serena back in a couple of hours, but, now she needed to calm her nerves e out her next move.

"What happened?" Serena questioned the doctors and nurses who were now exiting Chuck's room after dosing him with something that had completely knocked him out.

"It was a panic attack" one of the doctors stated quickly as he added something to Chucks file. "The staff forgot to remove the television" he added almost apprehensive.

"Oh my God" Serena whispered.

Her mother was most defiantly going to be on a war path when she got back. This was the second time this hospital had "Is… Is Chuck going to be okay?" she asked softly and sighed in relief when the doctor confirmed that he would be. She grabbed Erick's hand and made her way back to Chuck's room.

She wanted to watch over him while he slept. Make sure he was okay.

"I called mom" she said her voice wavering as tears pooled in her eyes, "She didn't answer" she added

Erick nodded he knew after all, he had seen her make the calls. "It's okay she'll be here soon and if she's not, we can handle it. You and I" he added

Serena nodded and sat down in the chair next to Chuck. She ran her hand over his softly and he didn't move. "You're right she added after a beat. " I take care of you, you take care of me, and we both take care of Chuck" said softly.


End file.
